If you follow me on twitter, you probably know that I'm taking summer class, and very simply, I describe it as my worst decision in college. However, I'm taking it with a totally awesome professor [Keith Martel] so that straightens some of the rods. Today in class, I laughed till I cried, and I am just about to tell you why.
So Keith Martel, my professor is the director of the Center for Faith and Practice at my school, and therefore attends this conference called 'Jubilee' every February in Pittsburgh. It's a christian conference that brings about 2000 college students together for worship and fellowship for one weekend.
Mr. Martel [yes, I refuse to call him Keith] was at one of these conferences, and there was a speaker which he described as a very beautiful woman. She wrote on everything from being a christian to renewal, restoration, community, and all that. Now she had aged, and as Mr. Martel [soon to be doctor btw.] guessed, she would've been in her 70's. I guess aging caught up with her and she was beginning to go blind as well.
So this beautiful woman was scheduled to speak at this conference. The time approaches and as she sits before 2000 college students to speak, she's so motivating and inspiring that no one had the urge "to pick up thier phones and text." She goes on and on, and then she says, "as Christians, we need to go into the world, and get that booty." [revised quote]. And no I didnt make a mistake. She said 'booty'. According to Mr. Martel, everyone is sitting there on the verge of laughter but trying not to. Not knowing what was going on, she said it again. This time, everyone started dying with laughter cause no one could hold it in. This poor lady has no idea why people are laughing so hard, and then she says it... a third time.
Apparently, 'booty' in her sentence meant treasure.So in other words, we as christians are supposed to go out and get that treasure. Now, this is the 21st century and I'm pretty sure 'booty' means only one thing to people of this century. I'm also sure, that people of this beautiful womans age know the word 'booty' to mean only one thing as well. The problem however, is that the meanings of these two different audiences do not correspond.
Quite literally, when Mr. Martel told this story, me and some other people in the class laughed. A LOT.
However, this is what got me dying with laughter. After Mr. Martel had explained how bad he felt for this lady because of her lack of knowledge of the definition of the term 'booty' to this present generation, one of my classmates said "Well, that can also be a treasure"! In other words, 'booty' as we know it, 'we' being you and me, can also be a treasure. Very very literally, I laughed so hard that I cried.
So beautiful ladies, and handsome gentlemen, the very next time you are going to give a speech to even as little as 10 or 20 people, make proper use of your dictionary, or research your audience to know what kind of diction they use. You don't want to say get that booty, and mean treasure, when everybody youre talking to knows booty to mean, quite simply, booty.
That's umm, getting that booty.. oh wait. I mean treasure.. as i do it.
~***shanpepe***~
Friday, May 20, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
...MAYBE BEFORE. BUT NOT ANYMORE.
I'm standing staring out my window. What am I staring at? A storm. A legit storm - like branches are breaking off trees, trash cans are being carried with the wind, and I can literally see the water running across the surface of the sidewalks. yes. That kind of storm.
Knowing me, I should be somewhere under my covers sipping on French vanilla cappuccino and watching a movie. But I'm standing here, looking at this storm, and I can't leave. Not because I don't want to, but because as I stare in the face of that storm, I see me. I see my life. I see you.
I watch as those branches break off the trees and all I see is the perfect chemistry we once had breaking off and falling away. My eyes follow the trash cans being carried with the wind, but all I see is how far away you're drifting from me everyday. I look for the meaning in the water running across the surface of the sidewalks, but I don't need an angel to remind me of how many directions my emotions have been running in for the past few days, or even more accurately, weeks. I take just one step back to view the whole storm, and very plainly, I see you and me.
I haven't always been the one to step out of a storm, but they say there's always a first time. For every time that I tried to be there for you, you were off attending to someone else. For every time that I tried to make you comfortable, you resided in your comfort and never cared about mine. For every time that I turned down an approach, you made out with someone that I may never get to know. For every time that I took the extra mile, you lifted the weight off your back, and put it on mine. For every time that I thought I could make things work, you never failed to remind me that it was only just a thought. If I had never been able to walk out of a storm before, you have just taught me to. Here it goes ...my first time.
The only way I can actually see what's going on in a storm is to step out of it... to step out of this... to step out of me.. and you. I don't expect to stand in a storm and not get wet, and there's only so much water I can take before I drown. I want to be able to experience sunshine... real beauty... true happiness, and I can't do that in a storm.
You've hurt me. So much that words alone cannot describe the sensations and feelings that have run through this heart and mind of mine. You've gotten me soaked so much in this storm that I didn't even realise it until I began to drown. Then again, maybe that is what I need to step out of it. Maybe that was the awakening I needed to recognize that I could have better. Maybe that was the battle I had to fight to still have some sense of emotion to accept someone else, because they say it is true that you don't know what you have until it's gone, but even more true, that you have no idea what you have been missing till it arrives.
I'm out of this with you, and on a new search for what my heart deserves. And I don't regret the time I spent in that storm - with or without you, because it has only served to teach me my value, and my worth. I'm sorry it took me this long to figure out that "us" is not what you want, and most importantly, not what I want either. I'm sorry that my happiness doesn't lie in you. I'm sorry, but I can't be with you.
I'm still standing at my window.. staring at the storm. Ordinarily, I would have gone out to pick the broken branches and hope they grow again, to put the trash cans right back where they belong, or to make the water move smoothly across the surface of the sidewalk.
***Maybe before, but not anymore*** I just turned my back to the window. I'm walking towards the warmth of my bed, and a hot cup of French vanilla cappuccino. I'll be watching a movie... and waiting for the sun to shine.
That's heartbreak... as I do it.
[Shout Out to Philip Dakum for the inspiration. The love never dies homie.]
~***shanpepe***~
Knowing me, I should be somewhere under my covers sipping on French vanilla cappuccino and watching a movie. But I'm standing here, looking at this storm, and I can't leave. Not because I don't want to, but because as I stare in the face of that storm, I see me. I see my life. I see you.
I watch as those branches break off the trees and all I see is the perfect chemistry we once had breaking off and falling away. My eyes follow the trash cans being carried with the wind, but all I see is how far away you're drifting from me everyday. I look for the meaning in the water running across the surface of the sidewalks, but I don't need an angel to remind me of how many directions my emotions have been running in for the past few days, or even more accurately, weeks. I take just one step back to view the whole storm, and very plainly, I see you and me.
I haven't always been the one to step out of a storm, but they say there's always a first time. For every time that I tried to be there for you, you were off attending to someone else. For every time that I tried to make you comfortable, you resided in your comfort and never cared about mine. For every time that I turned down an approach, you made out with someone that I may never get to know. For every time that I took the extra mile, you lifted the weight off your back, and put it on mine. For every time that I thought I could make things work, you never failed to remind me that it was only just a thought. If I had never been able to walk out of a storm before, you have just taught me to. Here it goes ...my first time.
The only way I can actually see what's going on in a storm is to step out of it... to step out of this... to step out of me.. and you. I don't expect to stand in a storm and not get wet, and there's only so much water I can take before I drown. I want to be able to experience sunshine... real beauty... true happiness, and I can't do that in a storm.
You've hurt me. So much that words alone cannot describe the sensations and feelings that have run through this heart and mind of mine. You've gotten me soaked so much in this storm that I didn't even realise it until I began to drown. Then again, maybe that is what I need to step out of it. Maybe that was the awakening I needed to recognize that I could have better. Maybe that was the battle I had to fight to still have some sense of emotion to accept someone else, because they say it is true that you don't know what you have until it's gone, but even more true, that you have no idea what you have been missing till it arrives.
I'm out of this with you, and on a new search for what my heart deserves. And I don't regret the time I spent in that storm - with or without you, because it has only served to teach me my value, and my worth. I'm sorry it took me this long to figure out that "us" is not what you want, and most importantly, not what I want either. I'm sorry that my happiness doesn't lie in you. I'm sorry, but I can't be with you.
I'm still standing at my window.. staring at the storm. Ordinarily, I would have gone out to pick the broken branches and hope they grow again, to put the trash cans right back where they belong, or to make the water move smoothly across the surface of the sidewalk.
***Maybe before, but not anymore*** I just turned my back to the window. I'm walking towards the warmth of my bed, and a hot cup of French vanilla cappuccino. I'll be watching a movie... and waiting for the sun to shine.
That's heartbreak... as I do it.
[Shout Out to Philip Dakum for the inspiration. The love never dies homie.]
~***shanpepe***~
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
BIRD POOP... YES?
The title of this post is in no way figurative, metaphorical, or symbolic. It is in fact, very literal. Bird poop. Bird as in that warm blooded vertebrate of the Aves class that is covered in feathers and flies; and poop as in defecating. We clear? Okay. Good. Now we can proceed.
I have had several encounters with bird poop. Be reminded again, that no part of this is figurative. It gets as literal as can be, and I know this might sound gross, but if you've had two encounters of a bird pooping on you, one encounter of a bird pooping on your food, and one last encounter of a bird pooping right in front of you and you narrowly missing being pooped on for the third time, then you'll agree that this just might not be a coincidence. And just in case you're wondering, yes. I have had two encounters of a bird pooping on me, one encounter of a bird pooping on my food, and one encounter, just yesterday actually, of a bird pooping right in front of me and me narrowly missing it.
Picture this. I am in a huge compound playing with my older sister and our friends. It's a warm sunny day outside and we're like all less than 12 so we're running all around and having fun. All of a sudden I feel this thing drop on my hand, and it was warm. I turn to look and its a thick liquid coloured white and dark green. My jaw dropped and I called my sister just so I could hear her say that it was a funny coloured rain drop and not confirm that it was bird poop. Rather unfortunately, she said "eeewwwww, thats bird poop." Of all places in the huge compound, of all the children's arms, of all the ground space and trees and roofs, the bird poop fell ON MY HAND. 1st time.
As an elementary school kid, I loved to eat my lunch at the picnic table near the teather ball because we all tried to become teather ball champs.. [oh, the memories.] This one beautiful day, I bought some fries and puff puff, and went to eat at the picnic table while we watched and played teather ball. I looked away for one second, and when I looked back, right next to my puff puff was this thick coloured white and black liquid. I didn't need an angel to tell me it was bird poop. Everyone around me started screaming ewwwww and packing up their own food. Of all the places under the blue sky, other plates of food, of all the other ground space, trees, roofs, the bird poop fell ON MY PLATE OF OF FOOD. 2nd time
Puerto Rico was very fun. Amazing to say the least. As we finished shopping that relatively cloudy day, we decided we were hungry and should get food. So we did. That was my first time ever having Church's chicken, and we all decided to sit outside. Under this tree was a little roundabout thing that we decided to sit on. On approaching it, I realised that it had bird poop all over it, but there was nowhere else to sit. I emptied one of my bags, and placed it on the surface of that thing so I could sit and other people did the same. After eating, I was just relaxing, and all of a sudden heard this tiny thud on my shoulder. Okayyyy what could that be? I turned to look, and there it was. The thick white, black, and green liquid. Of all the earth space, the trees, the number of shoulders, the roofs and the everything, the bird poop fell ON MY SHOULDER. 3rd time.
I would say never take summer class. It's boring and dum. And as I have to wake up at 8 every morning, it's definitely not my favourite thing. As I hurried to class yesterday hoping to make it in time, I checked my watch, and I had 6 minutes. Okay, I was almost there so I could take a breather and slow down just a tad bit. As soon as that happened, I took a step and right in front of my foot, there it dropped. Freshhhh wet all white liquid. Of all places under the blue sky, of all trees and roofs, and sidewalks, the bird poop fell RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FOOT. 4th time.
So there you go. 4 freaking experiences with bird poop. It made me think for real. 4?! Do I look appealing to be pooped on? With all these questions running through my mind [and this is a serious issue, do not laugh], I visited the all knowing - google. What, dear google, is the significance of being pooped on by a bird?
Google told me that some people say its good luck. Others agree, but say you have to eat it first. #pause. WHAT?! No comments. On to the next. Google said that other people say its totally bad luck. So I was at a loss here. What do I believe? I need to get to the bottom of this. So I asked google, what is it with bird poop and luck?
Google said according to someone, it is good luck because not only does it happen by random chance, but it is so disgusting that there has to be something good about it. Everybody that had an explanation for bird poop and luck on google said it was good luck. This leaves me even more at a loss. Whyyy then hasn't good luck been my friend!?
As is pretty obvious, I still haven't gotten to the bottom of this, but I want to believe that no one gets pooped on 4 times by a bird and calls it a coincidence. This BETTER be some sort of good luck thats taking a while to manifest, because it needs to be done already. I do not appreciate being pooped on by birds. At all.
That's being pooped on by birds... as i do it.
I have had several encounters with bird poop. Be reminded again, that no part of this is figurative. It gets as literal as can be, and I know this might sound gross, but if you've had two encounters of a bird pooping on you, one encounter of a bird pooping on your food, and one last encounter of a bird pooping right in front of you and you narrowly missing being pooped on for the third time, then you'll agree that this just might not be a coincidence. And just in case you're wondering, yes. I have had two encounters of a bird pooping on me, one encounter of a bird pooping on my food, and one encounter, just yesterday actually, of a bird pooping right in front of me and me narrowly missing it.
Picture this. I am in a huge compound playing with my older sister and our friends. It's a warm sunny day outside and we're like all less than 12 so we're running all around and having fun. All of a sudden I feel this thing drop on my hand, and it was warm. I turn to look and its a thick liquid coloured white and dark green. My jaw dropped and I called my sister just so I could hear her say that it was a funny coloured rain drop and not confirm that it was bird poop. Rather unfortunately, she said "eeewwwww, thats bird poop." Of all places in the huge compound, of all the children's arms, of all the ground space and trees and roofs, the bird poop fell ON MY HAND. 1st time.
As an elementary school kid, I loved to eat my lunch at the picnic table near the teather ball because we all tried to become teather ball champs.. [oh, the memories.] This one beautiful day, I bought some fries and puff puff, and went to eat at the picnic table while we watched and played teather ball. I looked away for one second, and when I looked back, right next to my puff puff was this thick coloured white and black liquid. I didn't need an angel to tell me it was bird poop. Everyone around me started screaming ewwwww and packing up their own food. Of all the places under the blue sky, other plates of food, of all the other ground space, trees, roofs, the bird poop fell ON MY PLATE OF OF FOOD. 2nd time
Puerto Rico was very fun. Amazing to say the least. As we finished shopping that relatively cloudy day, we decided we were hungry and should get food. So we did. That was my first time ever having Church's chicken, and we all decided to sit outside. Under this tree was a little roundabout thing that we decided to sit on. On approaching it, I realised that it had bird poop all over it, but there was nowhere else to sit. I emptied one of my bags, and placed it on the surface of that thing so I could sit and other people did the same. After eating, I was just relaxing, and all of a sudden heard this tiny thud on my shoulder. Okayyyy what could that be? I turned to look, and there it was. The thick white, black, and green liquid. Of all the earth space, the trees, the number of shoulders, the roofs and the everything, the bird poop fell ON MY SHOULDER. 3rd time.
I would say never take summer class. It's boring and dum. And as I have to wake up at 8 every morning, it's definitely not my favourite thing. As I hurried to class yesterday hoping to make it in time, I checked my watch, and I had 6 minutes. Okay, I was almost there so I could take a breather and slow down just a tad bit. As soon as that happened, I took a step and right in front of my foot, there it dropped. Freshhhh wet all white liquid. Of all places under the blue sky, of all trees and roofs, and sidewalks, the bird poop fell RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FOOT. 4th time.
So there you go. 4 freaking experiences with bird poop. It made me think for real. 4?! Do I look appealing to be pooped on? With all these questions running through my mind [and this is a serious issue, do not laugh], I visited the all knowing - google. What, dear google, is the significance of being pooped on by a bird?
Google told me that some people say its good luck. Others agree, but say you have to eat it first. #pause. WHAT?! No comments. On to the next. Google said that other people say its totally bad luck. So I was at a loss here. What do I believe? I need to get to the bottom of this. So I asked google, what is it with bird poop and luck?
Google said according to someone, it is good luck because not only does it happen by random chance, but it is so disgusting that there has to be something good about it. Everybody that had an explanation for bird poop and luck on google said it was good luck. This leaves me even more at a loss. Whyyy then hasn't good luck been my friend!?
As is pretty obvious, I still haven't gotten to the bottom of this, but I want to believe that no one gets pooped on 4 times by a bird and calls it a coincidence. This BETTER be some sort of good luck thats taking a while to manifest, because it needs to be done already. I do not appreciate being pooped on by birds. At all.
That's being pooped on by birds... as i do it.
Friday, May 13, 2011
WHY I LIKE LANRE DABIRI AKA ELDEE?
...Simply because he hasn't given me or you a reason not to; except of course you're one of those people that get's mad at another man's success. Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying he is perfect. We are all far from perfect, but understand that "sometimes, our only perfection is the fact that we are imperfect." [That's my quote by the way. :-)] So, what I am saying is, he's perfect in his imperfection; a model man I'd like to think and believe. I'm not going to ask you to change your opinion about eLDee, but I will back up my words. Sooooo, let's get it started.
First of all, He is a muslim man, and he's not afraid to hide that, even in a world that sometimes frowns upon people with strong moral or religious views. How do I know? Just don't ask too many questions. Maybe try following him on twitter, @eLDeethedon , or join his facebook page, eLDee. And in case you're wondering, no, I've never met him face to face.
Secondly, ya'll know this girl is all about the looks. [If you didn't know that, read my previous post.] I remember the first time I saw Eldee's picture a couple of years ago. I was like Hoooollyyyy Shiiiiit. Whhyyyy am I just knowing this is what he looks like?! To say the least, the bratha is on poinT. Yeah, he's naturally good looking, but I respect a man that makes an effort to always look presentable. Eldee is that man. He always has the neatest haircuts [proof] and the best tailored suits [proof]. You know how I feel about shoes and wrist watches? [refer to previous post] He prolly hits home on that too.I watched him on U-stream once, and minus laughing my way through it cause of how funny he was, he made an impression of 100% on the looks. Give it to him please. The man always looks amazing.
If you have any cause to disagree with me, abeg find a transformer, be my guest, and hug it.
Thirdly, he's an entrepreneur. A young and very successful man with a large heart. [yes, I said young. Don't hate.] For those of you who really don't know, Trybe Records? Yes, that's his. Plus you see, this is a young man making efforts to improve the quality of life of some people without raising the cost, and he does it through music, since that is what he does best. Recently, Trybe Records in the effort to showcase some of the best unsigned artists in Nigeria, put out this thing they called Top Talent, where people could send in songs and have the public vote on who the 'top talent' was. The winner is getting to work with him on his album, and gets a record deal from Trybe Records. He has crossed the finish line and has turned back to help people run the race.
Furthermore, he's a family man, married since 2008 and with a beautiful daughter. He's all about his family, and is still able to work and keep his fans on board. That's a lot of work. I mean, I'm one of those eLDee fans that has managed to get a little piece of every cake. He follows me on twitter [and replies almost all my tweets], and is my facebook friend. I remember once when a fan tweeted something about him being sweeeeet, and he said "Thanx, but please use the word sweet sparingly." That made me crack up. Dont even ask why, but I'm going to have to agree with that fan. He is a very sweet man. Very open about his family, and very evidently loves them very much, but he's also there for fans, talking to them and appreciating them.
In addition, eLDee is passionate about what he does. He loves music. He's not one of those people that is into music for the money and the fame. I say that because he could have done anything else with his life. Become an engineer, go to medical school, be in a court room everyday, drill oil, andd... what else brings good money? Name it. He could have done anything else, or chosen to draw houses. He's a qualified architect. He was a smart cookie and made the A's since high school. [proof]. So see, he's into music because that's what he loves. He's not in it to be better than anyone else in the game. He's not in it to to bring other people down. He's not in it to get involved in useless and childish politics in the music world - Big boy status. #score. He's in it for you, and me - people who love good music.
If you asked me to name as many of his songs as I could, I probably couldn't even name 5, (hyperbole...lol) because maybe I don't even know most of his songs. If you want to question my being a huge fan, twist your tongue and swallow your words. I'm a huge fan of more than just his music. Yes he's a good musician, but he is also an entirely good man. I'm a fan of the entirely good man.
So yeah, if you're a hater getting mad at people's success, eLDee will frustrate you very much, and kindly permit me to say that's a good thing. However, if you admire positively driven people that seek holistic transformation for the betterment of not only themselves but for other people around them and the society at large, then you'll admire eLDee. I'm pretty sure you know already which one of the two categories I fall in. One of my twitter followers said "You dont have to love eLDee, but you must respect him." #truthhhhh.
P.S. One thing that you should know - One of his big pet peeves is people calling him Oladele. That's not his name. His name is Lanre, which is a dimunitive of Olanrewaju, and Dabiri is his surname.
Well, that's about liking Lanre Dabiri...as i do it.
~***shanpepe***~
First of all, He is a muslim man, and he's not afraid to hide that, even in a world that sometimes frowns upon people with strong moral or religious views. How do I know? Just don't ask too many questions. Maybe try following him on twitter, @eLDeethedon , or join his facebook page, eLDee. And in case you're wondering, no, I've never met him face to face.
Secondly, ya'll know this girl is all about the looks. [If you didn't know that, read my previous post.] I remember the first time I saw Eldee's picture a couple of years ago. I was like Hoooollyyyy Shiiiiit. Whhyyyy am I just knowing this is what he looks like?! To say the least, the bratha is on poinT. Yeah, he's naturally good looking, but I respect a man that makes an effort to always look presentable. Eldee is that man. He always has the neatest haircuts [proof] and the best tailored suits [proof]. You know how I feel about shoes and wrist watches? [refer to previous post] He prolly hits home on that too.I watched him on U-stream once, and minus laughing my way through it cause of how funny he was, he made an impression of 100% on the looks. Give it to him please. The man always looks amazing.
Thirdly, he's an entrepreneur. A young and very successful man with a large heart. [yes, I said young. Don't hate.] For those of you who really don't know, Trybe Records? Yes, that's his. Plus you see, this is a young man making efforts to improve the quality of life of some people without raising the cost, and he does it through music, since that is what he does best. Recently, Trybe Records in the effort to showcase some of the best unsigned artists in Nigeria, put out this thing they called Top Talent, where people could send in songs and have the public vote on who the 'top talent' was. The winner is getting to work with him on his album, and gets a record deal from Trybe Records. He has crossed the finish line and has turned back to help people run the race.
Furthermore, he's a family man, married since 2008 and with a beautiful daughter. He's all about his family, and is still able to work and keep his fans on board. That's a lot of work. I mean, I'm one of those eLDee fans that has managed to get a little piece of every cake. He follows me on twitter [and replies almost all my tweets], and is my facebook friend. I remember once when a fan tweeted something about him being sweeeeet, and he said "Thanx, but please use the word sweet sparingly." That made me crack up. Dont even ask why, but I'm going to have to agree with that fan. He is a very sweet man. Very open about his family, and very evidently loves them very much, but he's also there for fans, talking to them and appreciating them.
In addition, eLDee is passionate about what he does. He loves music. He's not one of those people that is into music for the money and the fame. I say that because he could have done anything else with his life. Become an engineer, go to medical school, be in a court room everyday, drill oil, andd... what else brings good money? Name it. He could have done anything else, or chosen to draw houses. He's a qualified architect. He was a smart cookie and made the A's since high school. [proof]. So see, he's into music because that's what he loves. He's not in it to be better than anyone else in the game. He's not in it to to bring other people down. He's not in it to get involved in useless and childish politics in the music world - Big boy status. #score. He's in it for you, and me - people who love good music.
If you asked me to name as many of his songs as I could, I probably couldn't even name 5, (hyperbole...lol) because maybe I don't even know most of his songs. If you want to question my being a huge fan, twist your tongue and swallow your words. I'm a huge fan of more than just his music. Yes he's a good musician, but he is also an entirely good man. I'm a fan of the entirely good man.
So yeah, if you're a hater getting mad at people's success, eLDee will frustrate you very much, and kindly permit me to say that's a good thing. However, if you admire positively driven people that seek holistic transformation for the betterment of not only themselves but for other people around them and the society at large, then you'll admire eLDee. I'm pretty sure you know already which one of the two categories I fall in. One of my twitter followers said "You dont have to love eLDee, but you must respect him." #truthhhhh.
I know I must've wet some people's curiosity. lol.. Here's his Official Website. Plus, Vote for him as the twitter personality of the month for April. I'd LOVE to see him win. :-)
Very simply put, Lanre Dabiri Rocks. My. World. <3
P.S. One thing that you should know - One of his big pet peeves is people calling him Oladele. That's not his name. His name is Lanre, which is a dimunitive of Olanrewaju, and Dabiri is his surname.
Well, that's about liking Lanre Dabiri...as i do it.
~***shanpepe***~
Monday, May 9, 2011
LOOKS ARE DECEIVING? TAH! I WANT THEM ANYWAY :-)
You're amazingly cute. Hot. Sexy. You look like my NEXT boyfriend.
That was my facebook status. or wait. IS my facebook status as I write this post. The reason why I'm writing about my facebook status? Because as always, there has to be one person who tells you to look on the inside cause looks could be deceiving.
Now for starters, take life as a joke sometimes...its kinda fun.
Ok. onto more serious talk. I understand that you should look on the inside because that is what matters most. My dad always told me that to find the right man, you have to KNOW what you're looking for. He always encouraged me to write it down, and keep track of it too, so if I thought there was one more quality I needed or wanted, I could add it to the list without forgetting stuff. I obeyed, and trust me it works. So, I think a great point to start will be that I already know, and an well aware of what I want in a man.
Now you may be skeptical about the things I have on my list. Besides, that status is all physical right? Ok. Listen. I have A LOT of things on my list. Agreed----> some of them are really physical and superficial - You gotta look amazing in a three piece suit. You have to have neat haircuts and clean, cut fingernails. You have to wear nice wristwatches and shoes. I do have a lot of superficial and touching-the-surface stuff. But you know what? I am okay with admitting that, and I am not changing any of it. That's who I am, and that's what I want.
I'm not going to introduce a man to my parents and have to explain the reason why he's wearing a shirt that looks like its been chewed by a cow. I'm not going to walk into a dinner hall with a man who's hands look like he just shoveled dirt off his sidewalk. He's going to be shaking people and trust me, they'll notice the black underneath his fingernails. I'm not going to deal with going to see him at work and having half his shirt out of his belted pants, or his suit a tad too big. Quite simply put, a man is reflected by the shoes and wristwatches he wears - you got it, or you don't. I'm not going to deal with my people wondering if my man can't afford a comb because of his messy hair. I am not going to have to make excuses every time my friends want to meet my man because I don't think he's hot or sexy. I'm not trying to have a man that is the most attractive thing on the inside, but the least bit attractive thing on the outside. I'm NOT dealing with any of these.. and without an apology too.
I want to be able to take him home and my parents have a dropped jaw and say I did a good job. I want to stare at him from across the room and get a crush on him all over again because of how adorable he is. I want to be able to proudly hold his hand and introduce him to ANYONE as my man. Simply put, I want him to look like a MAN, not a BOY.
So, go ahead. Judge me all you want. Say I'm dum and naiive. Just remember, it doesn't hurt anyone that I want a well rounded man. I never said I don't want anything on the inside. As much as my "superficial and physical" list may seem really long, my "inside list" is even longer. Besides, there really is nothing anyone can do about it. I have my standards, and by the grace of God, I'll meet them. I tell him everyday what I want, and what I don't want. He's giving me the man, so He's who matters.
Let's just say that I am a girl who knows what she wants [thanks to my dad], and will not settle, because there is one man that has EVERYTHING that I want. " I just haven't met [him] yet." My dad has modeled the ideal physical man. I would not want anything less. Plus, if you're okay with having a man that is not physically attractive but has a wonderful personality and all that, go for it. I'm not saying you're wrong. I'm just saying that I want one that is attractive both on the inside, and on the outside. and, I WILL make that known. :-)
That's about wanting the looks too... as i do it.
~***shanpepe***~
That was my facebook status. or wait. IS my facebook status as I write this post. The reason why I'm writing about my facebook status? Because as always, there has to be one person who tells you to look on the inside cause looks could be deceiving.
Now for starters, take life as a joke sometimes...its kinda fun.
Ok. onto more serious talk. I understand that you should look on the inside because that is what matters most. My dad always told me that to find the right man, you have to KNOW what you're looking for. He always encouraged me to write it down, and keep track of it too, so if I thought there was one more quality I needed or wanted, I could add it to the list without forgetting stuff. I obeyed, and trust me it works. So, I think a great point to start will be that I already know, and an well aware of what I want in a man.
Now you may be skeptical about the things I have on my list. Besides, that status is all physical right? Ok. Listen. I have A LOT of things on my list. Agreed----> some of them are really physical and superficial - You gotta look amazing in a three piece suit. You have to have neat haircuts and clean, cut fingernails. You have to wear nice wristwatches and shoes. I do have a lot of superficial and touching-the-surface stuff. But you know what? I am okay with admitting that, and I am not changing any of it. That's who I am, and that's what I want.
I'm not going to introduce a man to my parents and have to explain the reason why he's wearing a shirt that looks like its been chewed by a cow. I'm not going to walk into a dinner hall with a man who's hands look like he just shoveled dirt off his sidewalk. He's going to be shaking people and trust me, they'll notice the black underneath his fingernails. I'm not going to deal with going to see him at work and having half his shirt out of his belted pants, or his suit a tad too big. Quite simply put, a man is reflected by the shoes and wristwatches he wears - you got it, or you don't. I'm not going to deal with my people wondering if my man can't afford a comb because of his messy hair. I am not going to have to make excuses every time my friends want to meet my man because I don't think he's hot or sexy. I'm not trying to have a man that is the most attractive thing on the inside, but the least bit attractive thing on the outside. I'm NOT dealing with any of these.. and without an apology too.
I want to be able to take him home and my parents have a dropped jaw and say I did a good job. I want to stare at him from across the room and get a crush on him all over again because of how adorable he is. I want to be able to proudly hold his hand and introduce him to ANYONE as my man. Simply put, I want him to look like a MAN, not a BOY.
So, go ahead. Judge me all you want. Say I'm dum and naiive. Just remember, it doesn't hurt anyone that I want a well rounded man. I never said I don't want anything on the inside. As much as my "superficial and physical" list may seem really long, my "inside list" is even longer. Besides, there really is nothing anyone can do about it. I have my standards, and by the grace of God, I'll meet them. I tell him everyday what I want, and what I don't want. He's giving me the man, so He's who matters.
Let's just say that I am a girl who knows what she wants [thanks to my dad], and will not settle, because there is one man that has EVERYTHING that I want. " I just haven't met [him] yet." My dad has modeled the ideal physical man. I would not want anything less. Plus, if you're okay with having a man that is not physically attractive but has a wonderful personality and all that, go for it. I'm not saying you're wrong. I'm just saying that I want one that is attractive both on the inside, and on the outside. and, I WILL make that known. :-)
That's about wanting the looks too... as i do it.
~***shanpepe***~
Thursday, May 5, 2011
...AND WHILE I WAS SOMEWHERE SMILING, A YOUNG MAN WAS DYING.
As I rejoiced some months ago at the approaching weekend, a young man was making his way out.. from here.. to somewhere that only God knows.
As I spoke to my family almost every other day, or week after that, a family somewhere wondered hard at the disappearance of their young man, and wished on a star just to hear his voice.
As I sat around the last couple of days with perfect knowledge about where my family was even across oceans, a family lived with the uncertainty about where their young man could be, only a couple of miles away.
As we as a school and community prayed fervently for his safe return, God was right beside us... saying NO.
Between looking forward to that weekend in January, and 7 30 a.m this morning in May, I was probably somewhere smiling, while this young man was dying.
As I basked in the glory of the feeling of being able to become and be called a seniour, the body of this young freshman boy was being pulled out the Beaver River.
As I sit on this bed and look forward to going home to see my family, a family sits somewhere and mourns because their young man will never return.
As I sit here and long to call my mom just to say how much I love her, a mother sits somewhere with swollen eyes, cause she never again, will get to hear her son speak.
...and as I sit here and wonder why God would let somethings happen, I get only one answer... "Because I am He."
We can scream and yell, and cry and wail, because after this long, hard period of uncertainty, the battle seems a loss. From a bright sunny day...to raindrops...to thunderstorms...to a setting sun...and now, total darkness.
...and through that piercing darkness, God lights the torch, places in it our hands, and says "I know it hurts. I love you." No explanations. No reasons. No meaning. Nothing.
We can ask why and seek answers, because after keeping the faith, he seems to have walked out on us. From being right beside us, holding our hands, and saying it will be okay... to loneliness, sadness, and excruciating pain.
...and through this pain that eats at the hems that hold our hearts together, God gives us a needle and says "I know you grieve. I am comforter; and though you feel alone, I never leave you...or forsake you." No explanations. No reasons. No meaning. Nothing.
Because no matter how hard we try to understand, we are incapable of it. And all God says is "Take my hand. I'll walk with you... through the darkness and the pain."
Rest In Peace Devon Minor.
~***shanpepe***~
For detailed news, click here.
**Photo credit here.
As I spoke to my family almost every other day, or week after that, a family somewhere wondered hard at the disappearance of their young man, and wished on a star just to hear his voice.
As I sat around the last couple of days with perfect knowledge about where my family was even across oceans, a family lived with the uncertainty about where their young man could be, only a couple of miles away.
As we as a school and community prayed fervently for his safe return, God was right beside us... saying NO.
Between looking forward to that weekend in January, and 7 30 a.m this morning in May, I was probably somewhere smiling, while this young man was dying.
As I basked in the glory of the feeling of being able to become and be called a seniour, the body of this young freshman boy was being pulled out the Beaver River.
As I sit on this bed and look forward to going home to see my family, a family sits somewhere and mourns because their young man will never return.
As I sit here and long to call my mom just to say how much I love her, a mother sits somewhere with swollen eyes, cause she never again, will get to hear her son speak.
...and as I sit here and wonder why God would let somethings happen, I get only one answer... "Because I am He."
We can scream and yell, and cry and wail, because after this long, hard period of uncertainty, the battle seems a loss. From a bright sunny day...to raindrops...to thunderstorms...to a setting sun...and now, total darkness.
...and through that piercing darkness, God lights the torch, places in it our hands, and says "I know it hurts. I love you." No explanations. No reasons. No meaning. Nothing.
We can ask why and seek answers, because after keeping the faith, he seems to have walked out on us. From being right beside us, holding our hands, and saying it will be okay... to loneliness, sadness, and excruciating pain.
...and through this pain that eats at the hems that hold our hearts together, God gives us a needle and says "I know you grieve. I am comforter; and though you feel alone, I never leave you...or forsake you." No explanations. No reasons. No meaning. Nothing.
Because no matter how hard we try to understand, we are incapable of it. And all God says is "Take my hand. I'll walk with you... through the darkness and the pain."
Rest In Peace Devon Minor.
~***shanpepe***~
For detailed news, click here.
**Photo credit here.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
REALITY... SOMETIMES, I REALLY HATE IT.
Close your eyes...
... remain in the solace of the moment - the clock is ticking, the window is cracked open so there's cold air blowing in soothing the sweat on your skin in the room steamy with damp ventilation. you hear the leaves rustle through the teeth of the passing breeze, and you tilt your head back a tad bit so it soothes your neck like cold in summer. there's guitar music playing very faintly in the background. It begins to rain slightly, and the drops of water beat your window slowly creating mist, making it impossible for you to see through. the little drops make their way through the crack in the window, leaving water on your window pane that glistens like precious stone from the light shining through the window. It's been that perfect moment.. until...
...something kicks your foot.
Open your eyes...
Reality is a bitch. Take it. or leave it.
Can I just say that I honestly hate how reality hits you hard in the face? Well, I don't care and I'm going to say it anyway. I hate it - not because I want to live a fantasy, but because sometimes you're in a fantasy you want to finish living before you return to reality. You KNOW its there, but you choose a fantasy to get a break from the world. Reality disturbs that. Sometimes, it lets you enjoy things in the moment ONLY, and right after that, its comes back to stare you in the face.
Why is it so hard dealing with the fact that you cannot get what you want all the time? You love someone who doesn't love you back. You have to deal with that reality. You work your ass off but you can't get all the A's. Deal with that reality. You want to be perfect and do things right all the time, but you're imperfect as oil water. Deal with that. You want to be the perfect Christian but you've sinned your whole freaking life. Deal with that. And now the one that keeps playing chords that are not fit for the tune of my heart - You ALWAYS lose those you love... and reality, being the bitch that it is, just says what is always says - Deal with it. You know what? S-c-r-e-w that.
Can I for once live in the fantasy of not losing someone I love? to death? to distance? to circumstance? to flimsy stuff? Cause that is me reality just kicked in the foot. It's been kicking me in the foot since I was born. That is me that reality keeps telling to deal with the fact that I may not be loved back by someone I love; that I can only get some A's; that I can't be perfect; that I am a sinner; that I WILL lose people that I love... and finally, that I have to deal with everything... ALL of it. I don't even have a choice. Wow. Thanks.
I know people play the tape about life giving you what you want, and you making the best out of it. I know that. I know that it doesn't matter what happens to me, but what I make out of what happens to me. I KNOW THAT TOO. But honestly, there are some times when you don't want to hear that. You feel me? There are times when all you want to do is whisper in God's ear "I think I need a change of reality right now." There are times when your heart can only take so much, and then breaks down. There are times when you try to put life together, and reality takes away many, many, many, many, pieces. It just leaves you a mess. Those times.. that I'm living in right now.
God refines me in those times. When i whisper in his ear that i need a change of reality, he just tells me that It's the most beautiful one already. When my heart can only take so much, he holds it in his hands, and mends all the wear and tear. When reality takes away many, many, many, puzzle pieces of my life, he replaces them with strength, forte, and power.
Before that however, he lets me walk through that fire. it burns, and it hurts. it scorches. it stings. It leaves me in helpless pain. It's one step at a time... one phase at a time. Then again, it starts alll overrr. only because reality never stops, and more unfortunately, it never ends.
that's reality.. as i do it.
~***shanpepe***~
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